Chatting online is one of the main ways many people now communicate- whether it is by chatting with your family or friends or meeting new friends. A question that is commonly asked is, if you’re in a relationship is chatting online OK? And when does the chatting go from friendly to overly flirty? Everyone has different opinions about this, some don’t see anything wrong in their partner messaging members of the opposite sex online but some are not happy about it to say the least. There are even sites for cheating these days and as immoral as they are, they are very popular. I am going to talk you through several scenarios, how your partner sees these and I am going to try to answer the big question, is online chatting cheating?
The secrecy of the situation can make it into cheating
If you are doing something behind your partner’s back that they do not know about and you know that if they did, they would not like it that constitutes cheating in my book. After all if the chatting was entirely innocent and you had no feelings for the person, why would you not tell your partner? Stealing any hours that you can talk to your online “friend” and telling your other half that you are doing something else is deceptive and there is something very wrong with that. If your partner knows who you are chatting with and the kinds of things that you are chatting about and does not mind, then that is fine.
Chatting online can be an emotionally connecting experience
If you find yourself counting down the minutes where you can go and talk to that special person online then it’s fairly obvious that you are developing feelings or at least building a bond with them. Maybe you can talk to them about things that you cannot talk to your partner about. By having these feelings, I feel that it is only going to spell heartbreak for your current relationship. At times, it can be much easier after a stressful day to type your feelings rather than talk to someone. Having somebody you can rely on is emotionally connecting which can lead to feelings on both sides and a relationship forming. Put yourself in the mindset of your partner, how would you feel if you found out that they had been spending a lot of time pouring their heart out to another person online? Exactly!
You say things that you would not say in person
When you talk online, it can almost feel like your fingers get a mind of their own. You can type things that you would never dare say to the person in real life and this is what makes the encounter so exciting. It’s normal to find other people good looking when in a relationship but we tend to brush that under the rug. When you talk to somebody online, you tend to be a little more carefree with what you say. You cannot physically see their reaction so it leaves you a little more confident in what you want to say to the person. It can feel like a game at times, like it isn’t really you, which makes us become really flirty and suggestive. Please keep in mind that although you are not physically talking to the person, you are still communicating with them. If anything, words spoken online can be even more damaging than if they are spoken in real life. This is because when words are spoken, they are gone. When they are typed, they remain on the screen reminding you both of what was said and you put yourself open to being caught by your partner. Also, when you chat with somebody online you can’t tell how it is being read. For example having a flirty joke might be taken the wrong way, giving the other party the wrong idea. This could open up a whole new door and could even lead to the other person becoming obsessed with you. Please be mindful when chatting online because crossing the line from friendly to flirty is highly likely and that is not very respectful to your current partner.
Emotionally connect to your partner
To avoid turning to the internet to find a fulfilling relationship, make sure that you have one with your partner. Those who are content in their relationship have no reason to chat online because they are getting that emotional support at home. Be there for each other, discuss your problems and be open about the things that are on your mind. Take time to communicate with your partner every day, be honest and trusting with each other. You should not be sharing your innermost thoughts with a stranger or an online friend; it should be with the person that you have made a commitment to in terms of a relationship. You can get everything that you need from your partner and if you can’t, maybe it is time to walk away.
There are lots of ways to cheat in the online world
There are so many sites for cheating online these days and this is obviously not acceptable but somehow they are made out to be by the creators. There are various sites for affairs on the internet, and there are equal number of cheating dating scams revolving around them. The cheater internet dating has gained good popularity over the time. This obviously starts with some type of online communication that would lead to meeting up and becoming a full blown affair. If your partner finds out about this you will definitely be putting your relationship at risk and be majorly damaging the trust that will take time to rebuild. Anything of an explicit nature such as cyber sex and sexting is cheating and that is a point that most people would agree with. However there is actually a book that has been published that says having explicit chat online is fine and not cheating because no physical contact is being had. In my eyes, anything that involves those kinds of thoughts going through your head about another person other than your partner is deceitful. Those who think it isn’t are kidding themselves.
A couple should set individual boundaries
Since everybody views flirty chat online differently depending on who you ask, talk about it with your partner. They might see harmless flirty Facebook chat as fine but draw the line at anything sexual being discussed. Some people might not want you to chat with the opposite sex online at all and you should respect their wishes. When the line is drawn in the sand, you both know where you stand and there can be no excuses if and when you get caught out.
Everyone has different views regarding whether online chatting is cheating. I don’t think it is cheating unless things get inappropriate and sexual. I also think that if you are having friendly banter online, your partner should know about it. If they don’t, I think that this is crossing the line. If something feels wrong then it is likely that it is. Sexting on your phone and using sites for cheating is definitely not acceptable and that is something that can’t be argued with. You want to have some freedom but try and find that healthy balance so that you don’t do anything to be disrespectful or hurt your partner in any way.